The beginning of transition

I just attended a yoga class and was dubious about the teacher. During the class he gave us a lecture on the importance of "super greens". When asked directly (there were only four attendees so the chatting got a little personal), I admitted that I had recently bought spirulina to feed my baby. I acknowledged I might eat some myself. Yoga Teacher then challenged us to guess his age, stating that if someone guessed right he would buy them a box of tea from the shop out front. This brought him a notch lower in my eyes - isn't yoga supposed to be about avoiding ego and not promoting it? 

But he said something during the class that I just loved. We were all standing at the top of our mats with hands in prayer position and Yoga Teacher said: There they were. Five olympians standing at the edge of their diving boards, about to twist through the air... I love it! The idea of us, together but separate, poised there and gathering what we needed to take the plunge. I don't think I've quite put my finger on what that brought up for me but it was a shining moment in my brain.

And now I (and my family) face many things that both thrill me and fill me with apprehension. It is time for this.

That is the big picture. The small picture: Leo doing some things he loves.

 

Riding the "El" in Chicago

 

Playing in the water in Millenium Park, Chicago

Belated musings on the homecoming

(written a couple weeks ago)

Home again after many weeks away. Although I wasn't desperate to stop travelling I am happy to be here. And on the final stage of our journey, the drive from Toronto to Ottawa, I found myself really excited for a number of things coming up in the near future: reconnecting with Ottawa friends, watching Leo change and grow and achieve new milestones, and organizing/tidying/purging in our home. 

 

Cactus garden in Holon, Israel

I hope to maintain that excitement and inspiration as this family once again finds a daily and weekly rhythm. I'm also striving to lighten up on the pressure and expectations I impose on myself (and others, namely my husband). Hmmm, where is the balance in motivating myself to work towards goals while being patient and realistic with my process? 

 

View over Playa Hermosa, Costa Rica

In a recent yoga class, when the instructor asked us to set an intention for the class, I had a realization that my intention is usually to remain grounded. Perhaps I need something a little different now, I thought: inspiration! I don't think it's too late to revisit this idea for this year... I aim to inspire myself and to keep my spirits joyful and uplifted. To enjoy what I have and also to keep my eye on possibility and creativity.

 

Playa del Coco, Costa Rica

Travel time

I've never travelled for an extended period of time but I have seen those travellers - sitting around in the common rooms of hostels, writing in their journals, and revisiting their favourite haunts in whichever city they've found themselves in rather than racing from one tourist attraction to the next. This series of short trips feels a little like the extended travel variety of travel. 

Family portrait at a monastery on Mount Carmel

Not that I'm leisurely wandering from hostel to cafe and writing in a journal. But I am taking things day by day, not too concerned with seeing the sights but enjoying where I am at any given time. Granted, this approach was partly because I left all the Israel planning up to Ze'ev, but there was little stress in just going along for the ride. I do enjoy a more active approach to travel as being in Israel felt almost too normal rather than being and international trip for us; I have a mental list of things I want to do for our next trip to Israel but I enjoyed this trip for what it was. Family, showing off my baby, eating delicious food, as well as some adventures like hiking up Masada and walking along the rampart wall around Jerusalem's old city.

Family portrait at the Dome of the Rock

People have asked me how it is to travel with a seven-month-old baby and in some ways it is easier than being at home - I don't have to clean, I cook less often, and my husband is around full time. This is a different way of being and a different rhythm to our day to day. I am looking forward to being back home again and getting into a new routine with Leo but in the meantime... onward to Costa Rica!

Leo on his seven month birthday in the old city of Jerusalem

Three months later...

Wow. [Enter cliché about time moving quickly.] I've actually had two friends remind me recently that I haven't posted on this blog in a number of months. Well, despite travelling like crazy for the next while I resolve once again to post every two weeks or so.

 

Leo on December 18 - his sixth month birthday

I heard something... somewhere... in the last couple weeks that people rarely smile when they are by themselves; smiling is a social expression. This started me thinking about how much more I smile since I have a baby. Not necessarily because I'm happier or feel more fulfilled (do I? This would require a complicated response...) but because I'm almost constantly talking to Leo with bright and exagerrated expressions. In some ways this is tiring, to be "on demand" all the time - but it is so sweet (and so worth it) when I realize I've been lost in thought or looking at something else and then catch Leo fully staring at my face and breaking into a huge smile when I finally return his gaze.

 

He didn't enjoy the crown, but hey - at least I'm smiling!

I also wonder whether this does make me/mothers/parents happier in general. Isn't it often repeated that smiling more will make us happier even if we're consciously initiating the smile rather than waiting for smiles to issue forth from our happiness? Ok, I'm not even sure if it's happiness I'm after in the grand scheme of things but I do wonder about the effect of all this smiling on my overall mood and sense of well being. 

 

Snowshoeing near Jasper, Alberta

I remember as a child and a teenager trying to capture or consciously realize the moments I felt most content, alive, inspired, full of life. I had one of those moments while snowshoeing with my family in Jasper almost a week ago. Smiling is wonderful but I also need to get myself walking through the trees regularly for the sake of my well being and inspiration.

 

Ze'ev and Leo looking over the Jasper townsite